If you’ve ever attended an African family gathering, you’ve likely encountered the unstoppable force known as the “African Auntie.” She’s usually a woman of wisdom, who’s known for the plentiness of their unsolicited advice.

They almost always think nobody’s life is complete without a spouse and a child. So, they’ll come at you with the question “when will you marry?”

If you’re a Nigerian adult (especially female, let’s be honest), this question is more inevitable than PHCN taking light. No matter how successful, brilliant, or peaceful your life is, there’s always that one aunt who treats your relationship status like it’s her prayer point.

The question is, how do you handle this annoying question without coming off as disrespectful? Here’s an ultimate guide that suggests many cool ways to deal with it. Let’s get right into it.

ALSO READ: Real Stories: ‘We dated for 6 years, but I’m not so sure I want to marry her’

The Polite Deflection

They’re your aunties and maybe uncles. Of course, we all know better than to be rude or disrespectful in this kind of relationship. So, it’s often better to choose the polite route. Smile sweetly and say:

“God’s time is the best.”

It’s vague. It’s diplomatic. It makes them pause – because who can argue with divine timing? It buys you several more months until the next family meeting.

Hit Them With the Reverse Psychology

Turn the table gently with:

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“Ah aunty, you haven’t found someone for me yet?”

This strategy always works because it leaves them with a realization that you’re also their responsibility. If you can’t get a suitor yourself, they should help you find one. So, they begin to scan all their memories for the names of the children of their rich friends. Use this as a cue to find your escape route before they turn to guilt tripping.

Use Career as a Human Shield

For those who want a more serious tone, try:

“Right now I’m focusing on building my career/business/spiritual growth.”

Say it with confidence and a small smile. While they want you to start a family, they also respect ambition. So they’ll likely calm down and let you be for the meantime. At least, you’ve bought yourself some meaningful time.

Drop the “Soft Drag”

This is for advanced players. Try a light jab cloaked in sweetness:

“Aunty, you married early, but did that stop your husband from stressing you?”

Then laugh and change the topic. This one’s risky but extremely satisfying if timed right. It doesn’t only jolt them back to reality, it is also a gentle reminder that you’re now old enough to think for yourself.

ALSO READ: 10 men share the red flags they watch out for when dating a woman

Quote the Economy

Blame the economy – because honestly, it deserves it.

“I’m still trying to afford my own rent, how will I now pay bride price?”

This one usually earns a round of understanding nods or a silent stare of defeat. They know the economy is bad, and they’re not even ready to contribute. So they’ll likely leave you before you ask them to sponsor your wedding.

In Nigeria, lectures, studies, and assignments characterise campus life, and a sprinkle of romance here and there. Did you really attend a Nigerian tertiary institution if you didn’t try love?

I mean, it’s like a six-unit course that must be completed. But while campus love is a thing of dreams, beauty, and butterflies, there is a raging debate about which is truer between campus love and real-life dating.

Which one is scarier between the concepts? Hold on and walk with me as I unpack the romance rollercoaster that is Campus Love vs. Real World Dating—and why both come with their kind of wahala.

The Vibes Are Different

ALSO READ: 10 men share the red flags they watch out for when dating a woman

Campus Love feels like a Netflix romance blockbuster. You meet during group assignments, flirt at the library, or lock eyes in the reading room, pretending to be focused. At this point, life is simpler, and so, love is vibey. No rent, no fuel price stress – just vibes and vibes alone, with the one your soul longs for.

Real World Dating, on the other hand, is like LinkedIn meets. Before you even plan a date, you’re running background checks, dealing with trust issues, and asking existential questions like: “What exactly are we?” You may as well sign in with a therapist before you begin.

Money Matters

In campus love, being broke is part of the experience. You both eat Gala and Coke, walk instead of taking a keke, and “Netflix and chill” is often just “laptop and vibes.”

In real-world dating, being broke? A red flag. Dates now involve fine dining, Uber fares, and surprise birthday gifts. Financial stress becomes a third wheel in your relationship, and we all know how burdensome that can become, especially if you’re still struggling to find your footing.

Commitment and Intentions

Campus relationships can feel deeply emotional, but many don’t survive graduation. Once NYSC or job hunting kicks in, so does the ghosting.

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In the real world, people either want marriage, vibes, or something in between – and figuring out which one can take months. One moment you’re planning baecations, the next thing you’re begging your partner to explain what they mean by saying they don’t want anything serious.

So, Which One Is Scarier?

Honestly? Both.

ALSO READ: 7 red flags in women that men must not ignore

Campus love is scary because it’s intense but temporary. It feels like forever until it isn’t.

Real-world dating is scary because it’s slow, cautious, and emotionally expensive. You’re older, wiser, and maybe a little more tired.

But here’s the beauty: both teach you something. Campus love shows you your capacity for butterflies. Real-world love shows you your capacity for boundaries and growth.

Once upon a time, our parents taught us that Ankara was strictly a “Sunday best” material.

That’s why we always kept our Ankara materials under the box until it was time for owambes, family portraits, and special Sunday gatherings. But we’re no longer in that generation.

We’re seeing nearly everything change in the fashion world, including the Ankara tradition. Ankara has suddenly gotten a glow-up, and Gen Z is certainly behind the wheel.

We’re seeing an unprecedented shift from what Ankara used to be. Today, it’s bolder, cooler, and “younger.” Let’s look at all the ways our young champions are reviving traditional fashion using Ankara.

ALSO READ: 18 stunning Ankara outfit ideas for Easter Sunday

1. The Rise of Ankara Mix & Match

We’re seeing thrift shopping (a.k.a. “bend down select”) becoming popular among young people. Sellers and designers know this, so they’re trying everything to have options available for the young. This has given birth to the Ankara mix-and-match tradition. This is why you’ll see Ankara skirts paired with vintage tees and bomber jackets with Ankara linings. It’s fashion fusion, Nigerian edition.

This mash-up style screams: “I’m repping culture, but I’m doing it my way.”

2. Tailor Culture 2.0

Back in the day, your mum dragged you to the tailor for Christmas clothes. Now, you’re sliding into young designers’ DMs with Pinterest boards and mood inspirations.

Gen Z designers are ditching boring cuts for cropped tops, flared pants, patchwork shirts, and even puffer jackets – all made with Ankara. They’re changing the sewing culture to suit modern trends. It has become obvious that they want to tell stories with every cut, and they’re doing it just as well.

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3. The Rise of Ankara Streetwear Brands

A wave of fashion startups is using Ankara in non-traditional silhouettes. Think streetwear labels that make:

• Oversized hoodies with Ankara pockets

• Joggers with tribal prints

• Ankara canvas sneakers

• Reversible bucket hats

ALSO READ: How to slay in an owambe with your Ankara fit

You’ve seen them around. They’re becoming more popular these days, and we love the level of creativity they are coming with.

4. Genderless, Limitless Fashion

In the past, traditional Ankara was often boxed by gender. But Gen Z doesn’t care, and that’s why they’re redefining how it’s done. Men are rocking skirts. Women are wearing agbada. Everyone is wearing what feels good and looks fire.

This has caused us to see Ankara as a fabric of expression rather than the fabric of expectation it used to be.

5. Social Media = Style Playground

TikTok and Instagram Reels have become Gen Z’s digital runway. Young Nigerians are styling Ankara with sneakers, chains, sunglasses, and Gen Z confidence.

One viral video can turn a local tailor into a fashion influencer. Thanks to social media, Ankara is going global, getting likes from Lagos to London.